Sophrosyne

How do you want to live your life?

Learning life’s lessons

on December 10, 2012

As we near the end of 2012, I thought it might be useful to reconsider our perspectives about some issues that we might face in our daily lives. A very good place to start is our attitude towards people in our lives that are not as nice as they should be. This means that on our part, we have already taken the necessary steps to do whatever we can to maintain a decent relationship. And the people who I am referring to could be bosses, work colleagues, or family members.

In one of my previous posts, I have stated that they best way to rid yourself of the negativity in your life is to eradicate the toxic people in your life. I still stand by that statement if it is achievable  because sometimes there are some people in our lives that we cannot get rid of. Then it boils down to how we view and manage them whilst they are in our lives.

Everything happens for a reason as well as people we meet in our lives. Life is such that the problem you face will continue to escalate until you are able to confront it and deal with it. What I am trying to say here is this, your problem will not go away until you have dealt with it properly. If you ignore it or try to use a shortcut, life will give you a bigger problem but in a similar form. Linking back to today’s topic, the people we meet in our lives shows us that life is not perfect but we can learn to manage it so that our lives can be happier.

This is how I view the negative and toxic people in my life. Their purpose in life may be to make me miserable and I can dwell on that and allow them to achieve their goal; or I look for the positives in that within the toxicity, there is a lesson for me to learn. This is not the first time that I have posted on this topic, I hope that by sharing my experiences with my readers, I can facilitate changes within the self that will allow for transformational growth.

The most recent challenge I had to face was between standing up for my personal beliefs or give in to someone highly respected. In order to maintain peace, many years have passed with me just giving in. However, the peace that I so badly craved never lasted for very long. To make things worse, it seemed nothing can placate this person. I have always stood my ground, except in these circumstances. It suddenly dawned on me that the reason why it is not getting resolved is because it was never addressed properly. If I may, I feel that allowing someone to trample over your personal beliefs and values is akin to bullying. By not facing up to the aggressor, you are telling them that it is okay to be treated badly. Of course, do take the time to get a few different people’s opinion before you confirm that you are indeed the victim because very often people can only see their side of the story. And of course, not everyone is confrontational. I said this before and I will say this again; do whatever it takes to ensure that you are happy. You do not have to accept and do what I do. Do what feels good for you. Yes, I know it sounds very self-centred but until you need to take care of yourself first before you can take care of others.

I know that today’s post can be a tat controversial but keep an open mind and do take the time to have a think about it.

 


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