How do you want to live your life?

Getting rid of burden

on February 8, 2013

For those of you who are not too familiar with the chinese culture; in 2 days time we get to celebrate the lunar New year; which means that we get a second chance to set of new goals for the new year and have another go at it.

I continue to emphasise on this point: Know who you real friends are, keep and nurture those with all the resources you can afford. As for the rest, drop them very quickly!

Quick guide to how to recognise your good friends:

It is not about how long you have known each other; it is how you bring out the best in each other. I realised this because I met some of the most amazing friends in the last 2 years. It was not a chore to be around them, in fact it was always great fun! All things aside, they should always make you feel good about yourself, there is no need for you to prove yourself to them. The acceptance is mutual and empowering.

The ones with a warning sign are the ones who constantly give you ‘constructive criticism’, which in fact is a guise to put you down. You feel that you cannot be yourself around them and have an urge to prove yourself to them that you are worthy of their friendship. In a nutshell, you are on eggshells in their presence. That is a pretty good giveaway that they are the ones you need to avoid.

You ask me: why do I keep harping on this ‘choosing the right friends’ topic? It is because over the years, I have learned that besides family, the friends that you spend time with have the greatest influence on you. If not for the wonderful friends I met in my lifetime, I will not be where I am, doing what I am doing right now. They love me for who I am, validating that I am good enough.

Having the right positive influence in one’s life is so important! That is why I continually post on this topic. I hope to empower my readers to choose the right friends and not to be afraid to let go of the ones who are hindering their growth. Needless to say, I have friends who seems to have my interests in mind and although some of them really believe that they do. I refuse to be in the company of people who needs to ‘fix me’. I need to be clear on one point, I am not so arrogant as to say that I am perfect and do not need to improve myself. I am simply saying good friends love you for your flaws. They know when to intervene, whenever they choose to tell you something, it is your personal growth they have in mind. That is different from those who are constantly trying to make you a better person. It is almost as if they bought a defective item so that they can work on it. Thus growing their own ego instead of growing you as a person.

So, I urge you to have a serious think about this topic, read this on pinterest:

“You are only as good as the people you surround yourself with so be brave enough to let go of those who keep weighing you down.”


letting go

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